This week has already been rough. As most of my blog readers know (all 5 or 6 of you), a wonderful man from our church was killed this weekend in an auto accident. I attended the visitation last night and I have never seen anything like it! I really believe there were over 1,000 people who attended his visitation. We stood in a line for literally 3 hours to be able to give our condolences to the family. For those of you that don't know the Carter/Howell family, they are the type of people who have made a tremendous impact on thousands of people! Malcolm Howell was such a down to earth, gentle, sweet man who has a wonderful wife and 2 beautiful daughters! Please pray for these families as they grieve and try to heal.
Well, this Saturday will be the 9 year anniversary of our son, Braeden's death. I can't believe it's been 9 years! Being at the visitation last night flooded so many memories and feelings! When I hugged the family, I was so overwhelmed with sadness, I couldn't control the tears. They actually told me how hard it must be for me to be there. Wow! How do I respond? I just hugged them and told them I would always be here if they needed to talk.
Some days I ask all the "what if's". I still want to know why I lost my baby boy. Why did Stephanie, Katherine, and Emma lose such a wonderful husband and father? I am baffled at why we as Christians go through so many horrible things in our lives. My friend Shannon and her husband, Michael, have been through so many heartaches in trying to have children, and now trying to adopt. Satan is so prevalent in this world! I have some other friends who are dealing with their teenage daughter who is severely depressed and often suicidal. What did we all do? We are good people- we don't deserve this! I am reminded daily of all my christian friends who have dealt with insurmountable heartache. Cancer, death, finances, children- is there no limit to what Satan won't hit us with?
I'm sorry for rambling. Please pray for our family, for the Howell's and Carter's, the Holman's, the Thompson's, the Lindsley's- I could go on and on. Satan wants us to believe that there is no God, or that He has abandoned us, or maybe that God is punishing us.
One more week until school. Yikes!
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2 comments:
Just checking in, you're always in our thoughts and you're definitely in my prayers. I know this must be a very difficult week for you and although I've never experienced death that close to me, I know that your faith is strong and God will take care of you. I'll be thinking of you. Love you girl, Crystal
I'm so sorry for how you must be feeling. I love you!
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